10 Minor Inconveniences That Suck Way More Than They Should
When you're with your best friends, this doesn't necessarily apply. What I'm talking about is when you're with someone that you're only kind of friends with, or even worse, when two people are hanging out with a mutual friend, and the mutual friend leaves. You know you have to try and keep up conversation, but just like your failed second grade science fair project, the chemistry just doesn't work. At least with the mutual friend situation you can talk about the friend as common ground, but even that can run dry. "Taylor is so funny. I really enjoy him." "Yeah, I like him too." Congrats.
On the one hand, you are following the rules. You are waiting for the light to change or for the lane to clear so you can cross safely and not interfere with traffic, an admirable decision from a responsible citizen. On the other, your rebellious counterpart is brazenly tempting fate with his disregard for law. Cocky? Maybe. Bold? Absolutely. However, what matters most is the feeling that you incur upon seeing this challenge to your bravery: shame. You don't know why and I don't know why, but this phenomenon is so common that Urban Dictionary has defined it as "curb shame." I guess good guys really do finish last.
There is an unwritten rule that if you didn't hear what someone said to you the first time you can only ask them to repeat it one more time. After that you simply have to just smile, nod your head and pray that they didn't just ask to borrow $20. This situation usually occurs with someone who speaks quietly, but if you're also hard of hearing? God help us. God help us all.
Remember that episode of Seinfeld where George's fiancée Susan starts hanging out with George's friends, and he gets upset because all of a sudden his "worlds are colliding?" Oh you don't because you're 13? Well in any case, this is a similar issue. School/work and real life are separate entities and should therefore be treated as such. It's implied that when you say "Bye, see you Monday!" at the end of each week, what you really mean is "Bye, I'm now going to be with the people that I hang out with by choice, please don't ask me to go to staff happy hour!". At least if it's a coworker, you can probably bond over how much of a jerk your boss is, but if it's your teacher? I don't know, maybe you can talk about polynomials or something.
Face it, there was a time when you cared about chain messages, "like for a tbh" statuses and what your Chinese name is based on your initials. And your 12-year-old self posted about it...a lot. Getting that visit from the Ghost of Facebook Past each time one of your cheeky friends resurrects a particularly damaging memory is nothing short of humiliating. Tbh, maybe you should delete your account.
I'm not talking about someone who walks extremely slow. In most of those cases, you can simply move to the side and pass them. What I'm talking about is when you're tailgating someone just a tiny bit slower than you, so that to pass them you have to make the jump to sidewalk hyperspace and power walk like you're an out of shape 53-year-old attempting to exercise. In most cases this situation is just an unlucky matchup, so don't take it to heart. But it sucks.
Whether it's for school or work, seeing some poor chap sweating bullets over every word read straight off of a Power Point slide is cringeworthy. Even though it's not you up there, it can get so bad that you'd almost rather be the one on the cross, dying for public speaking's sins. Almost. In most cases having to perform such a task is a compulsory assignment, so much like the drafted soldier that is forced to fight an unjust war, this presenter is thrust into something they never signed up for. Please, a moment of silence for our fellow awkward orators, and may they rest in Valhalla.
I know this isn't a social situation like the rest of the list, but honestly, why did God have to make the best fruit so marginally uncomfortable? No wonder Adam and Even suffered after they ate from the forbidden tree.
Most people with a brain understand that communism is dead...except apparently whenever you go out to a restaurant. There is no reason to try to bum a bite of my food as if we're in some herpes infested hippie commune. Yeah, I know my meal looks good, that's why I ordered it. I'm sleepy. Would it be okay if I slept in your bed for a week? Didn't think so, because it's yours. Furthermore, there will be no quid pro quo on the matter. It's not my fault you ordered just a salad, so don't offer a bite of your meal as if it's a worthy trade. The only possible exception to this is if someone orders the bloomin' onions from Outback Steakhouse, in which case, diners of the world unite!
Just stop. Please.
