It can be difficult to know what to say when a friend is going through a breakup, but it is important that you show your support in any way that you can. Being present is the first step to being there for your friend.
Here are a few other ways that you can help out a friend in need.
Allow your friend to feel what they need to
Every person handles breakups differently and it is important to remember whatever your friend is feeling is a valid emotion. Whether they are angry, sad or display reckless behavior, it is important as their friend not to try to dismiss their behavior or feel it is your responsibility to always cheer them up.
The most important thing that you can do as their friend is to stay by their side and clearly state that you will support them no mater what.
Give yourself space if needed
It is also important to make sure that you know your limits as to what you can give your friend; after all, you are only human. A friend in need can be taxing on a friendship if you ignore your own needs, so it’s important to not feel guilty when saying no to certain things. When you need to dedicate some time to yourself, make sure to do so clearly, but gently tell your friend you need to take care of some personal things.
Afterwards, let them know when you are available to hang out again, so that your friend can look forward to your company and also so there is no miscommunication between you two.
Attend to the details
One of the best ways you can be helpful is by making sure certain things in your friend’s life are taken care of. One of the biggest ways you can assist your friend with is to bring food over. Whether it is a pot of homemade soup or a pizza you have picked up, good food truly does help nourish a broken heart.
Other things that you can help with are walking their dog, picking-up their dry cleaning and helping sort through their mail. After a breakup, the smallest tasks can seem burdensome and being able to have someone else take care of those details for a while is a godsend.
Encourage your friend to be active
After a breakup, it is easy to want to stay at home in your pajamas on the couch and binge watch Netflix. While this may be part of the grieving process for your friend, it is important that you also encourage him or her to get some fresh air. Start out by suggesting a walk around the neighborhood. Even a 30 minute walk can do wonders for your heartbroken friend, offering a change of scenery. If your friend is up to it, take a day trip somewhere that you both do not normally go. Heading to the beach or a nearby state park can be a great temporary distraction for your friend for the day and help clear their mind.
Indulge in an activity that your friend enjoys
Does your friend enjoy basketball? Take them to a local game to cheer on their favorite team. Does your friend have a sweet tooth? Treat them to a chocolate fudge sundae. During a breakup, it is important to remind a friend of their passions and help them remember that they can feel happy once again. Avoid surprising your friend and instead ask them first about whether they want to do a certain activity. They may have a bad association with certain places or things that reminds them of their ex that you are not aware of.
