Wo mujhey dekhta tha toh yun lagta tha jese main bani hi us kay dekhnay kay liye hun. Mujhy shoaq tha uska, mujhy uski wo chah thi jo kisi makhlooq ko makhlooq kay liye ho toh gunnah ka roop dhaar lay. Mujhy us ki nazar chahiye thi. Mujhy us ki muhabbat us ka khayal us kay dill ka ek ek gosha chahiye tha. Main khud toh gunnah mein thi hi, mujhy wo bhi wese hi gunnahon mein latt patt chahiye tha.

 

Magar wo shayad wesa kabhi tha hi nahi. Kam az kam mere liye toh nahi. Wo mere liye kabhi wese enayat bann k aya hi nahi. Mohubbat ka wo doar jisey main rangeen kehti thi, wo mehiz ek imtehaan tha aur main, main us imtehaan mein haar gae. Yahan takk kay main ny Allah ki nafarmani ki us kay liye, aur phir us ce dagha ki apny liye. Gandagi ka ek ambaar tha mere upar, abhi bhi hai. farq sirf itna hai kay pehli main uss gandagi ki bohut gehraiyon mein thi phir bhi mujhy paak honay ki chah na thi. Aur aaj mujhey is gandagi se nijaat ki chah hai.

Aj mujhy NUR chahiye mujhay wo maqam chahiye kay roz-e-mehshar mera sar buland ho. aj mujhy wo rutba chahiye jo mera honay chahiye tha ASHRAF-UL-MAKHLOOQAT ka. Aj mujhy pata hai k Allah mere liye kaafi hai, mujhy wo sab ata karny k liye jis ki khwahish main ny ya mere nafs ny kabhi ki. Aga iss jahan mein wo mujhay sab kuch na ata kar dey toh us jahan mein mujhay zaroor milega. Mujhy apnay Rabb pe yaqeen hai.

Mujhy aj us insaan ki nazar ki khwahish hai bhi toh us shiddat ce nahi ma hi uss munasbat ce jis ce pehly thi. Mujhay makhlooq sey ziyada Khaliq ki chah hai kion kay humain haqeeqi zaroorat us Khaliq ki hi hoti hai. Wo hi humarey liye kaafi hai. Baqi kisi shay ki koi taqat nahi koi hesiyat nahi.

Keep smiling. Respect others. Good luck. :)