Who Was It With? 

Eric

When Did You Realize It was Love? 

When my feelings didn't change, even after I found out who he really was.

What Did It Feel Like? 

The first time I saw him, I didn't think in my head, "he's hot", or "he's cute". It was just this natural, instant attraction. Within a few weeks, I'd really fallen for him. One day I was trying to work, but it was hard because I was weak at the knees and couldn't stop thinking about him. I'd sweat and get butterflies before my class with him, but whenever I started talking to him, I felt this wonderful calm. I'd look into his eyes, and just felt this connection. I'm usually a very calculating person, but one day I just lost control and couldn't stop smiling and gazing into his eyes.

What Happened Next? 

He'd come up and hug me and squeeze my waist, and ask me about my life and seemed really interested. We went to lunch a few times. I was crazy about him, but I knew he liked some other girls as well, and I felt like I was competing. He asked me to homecoming after his original date walked out on him. I said yes, but was caught off guard when he asked me to date him a few days later. I felt like it was premature because I didn't know him that well yet, but I thought it might be my only chance. I knew that he couldn't possibly like me as much as I liked him, so the first day we went out, I tried to play it cool.

On that first day, he felt me up and stole my first kiss. I should have said no, but I wasn't quite sure what to do, and I kind of enjoyed it. But that was the point where I knew it wouldn't last; I figured he would either get bored and dump me for another chick, or break up with me when I refused to have sex with him. Sure enough, after that first day, he ignored me during class. Finally, he came over and said "I just have a lot on my mind right now." So I gave him space, but knew what was coming. The breakup happened over text, I texted him first and asked what was going on, because I was scared to face him in real life; I knew I'd just break down and start crying.

He said he liked me, but was dating me for the "wrong reason". We ended up agreeing to go to homecoming, as "really good friends". I tried to be a good sport and not show hurt, but a few days later I told him I was angry. He hugged me and apologized. I felt better until I found out, a few hours before homecoming, that he'd dumped me for another chick. So I told him I didn't want to go with him, and went with friends instead. At the dance he kept starting at me, and came over and told me the chick broke up with him, he was really upset. I think he regretted breaking up with me; he came over and danced with me for awhile, until I decided I'd had enough.

Next week, he came back to school, bragging that he'd made out with a bunch of chicks. At this point I was still trying to be friends, but we were growing apart. Then, he started dating one of my best friends; it was purely sexual attraction, so I told her she was hurting me and some ugly drama happened. My friend and I forgave each other quickly, but I never really forgave him. We see each other at school often. He's tried to chat, I think he misses me a bit, but usually we ignore each other. 6 months later, still missing him like mad

Lessons Learned

• Guys REALLY want sex. This desire completely clouds their judgment, and they do stupid things that will hurt you.
• Guys don't see things the way girls do. Unless you explain things, they won't understand how you're feeling at all.
• Never chase them after they leave you. It doesn't work, and just gives them more power over you. (It hurts every day, but I've managed to stick to this rule.)
• It's almost impossible to be "just friends" with someone you're in love with. Anyway, if they mistreated you, do they even deserve your friendship?
• Love hurts. I don't think I'll ever be over him, but it was worth it.