Stuff that belly.

It’s time to enjoy some location based tastiness with some location based snacks:

• Massive bag of wet popcorn at the movies. Squirt some hot buttery-like substance on that corn get ready to chomp through the previews. Now, there are two possible endings to this story — dropping the three-quarters full bag to your feet after five minutes and cursing yourself for getting too much, or getting your hands and face disgustingly greasy while powermunching your way to the burnt kernels at the bottom.

• Assorted bag of no-name brand chips on an airplane. It’s all about the airplane snack that was made by that no-name company specializing in tiny bags of freezing cold Fritos knockoffs.

 

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• Hot dog at the ballgame. Load that crispy-skinned wiener up with toppings and get ready to chow down with a big cup of suds before the first pitch. Soak up those afternoon rays and enjoy the ballpark air as your tastebuds start sizzling. It’s well worth the seventh inning heartburn.

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• Pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving. When you’re finished your third helping of mashed potatoes it’s time to make room for of a thick slice of pumpkin pie with whipped cream. Undo your belt buckle and let the buttons pop because it’s time to let it all out … before stuffing it all in.

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• Orange Julius at the mall when you’re in the middle of shopping with your girlfriend. It is illegal to drink Orange Julius anywhere else so grab a big straw and pray for relief.

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• Funnel cake at the amusement park. “Hey, are we about to spin upside down on the roller coasters, crash into each other in bumper cars, and run around a pitch black haunted house? Cool, just lemme load my stomach up with a giant paper plate full of deep fried dough first.”

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• Roasted marshmallows at the campfire. Oven baked marshmallows in front of the fireplace channel just isn’t as good.

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• Anything the parents won’t notice is missing while you’re babysitting.After you put the kids to bed it’s all about snagging a handful of chocolate chips, diving into the open bag of chips, or taking a few spoonfuls of ice cream and then smoothing over the top so it looks like nobody was there.

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Yes, location based snacks are great because they only come around once in a while. After all, ballpark franks and deep-fried funnel cakes might get boring every day but as little blips of tastiness they do the job just fine. So next time you’re racing around the mall, running around the fair, or finishing a giant family dinner over the holidays make sure you take the time to relax … indulge those hunger attacks … and enjoy some mouthwatering location based snacks.