Today's blog is just a thought which I badly want to get into typing or writing, whatever it is called. I have been thinking about this for years, and I thought it is just right to post this today, the night before one of my friends say "I do".
Video credits: The School of Life via YouTube
Have you considered getting married? Yeah, no? What were you thinking when you decided to say yes to a proposal? Or better yet, what was going on your mind when you asked for that girl's hand and dropped the scariest yet also the most exciting question?
Well, perhaps a majority of the ladies out there would love to walk down the aisle, get themselves in a short movie focused with their pre-nuptial clips as well as that during the ceremony, that getting dressed and having their makeups on is such an achievement. Getting married is definitely a celebration worth reminiscing but to some, it could also be just a certificate for bondage.
Let's deal with how getting married these days is becoming a pain, both in the head, in the heart and in the pockets.
When We Were Younger...
Image credits: George C. Busico
At the time of this writing, my former colleague, a good friend will bid goodbye to singlehood. Its quite funny that out of the three of us, (three colleagues who had longtime relationships) James and I were the first to get married, Dhory and Carlo will tie the knot tomorrow while the longest of the three of us, Don and Tanya don't have plans yet so far.
As a background, I just want to share that the three of us, Dhory, Tanya and I were so close to our previous company, we belong to the same escalation team, we almost like the same things, travel, photography and fun while we also have different ideas and standing on certain things but we gel well. In fact, we always travel together to different parts of Cebu on our motorbikes together with our "then" boyfriends, take lots of pictures, we cook at our apartment, watch movies, talk about everything and we definitely felt like sisters.
Image credits: George C. Busico
But of course, all things in life has to come to an end, our friendship didn't end however, our time together had somehow drifted when we went on with each of our lives. I went to Dubai, Dhory went to Japan and Tanya went to Singapore. Although we were miles apart, we still did the same thing - went abroad, worked as overseas Filipino workers and this one is funny, left our boyfriends and had long distance relationships.
Getting Married...
Image credits: George C. Busico
Dhory, my friend, for sure is very excited, or perhaps excited is an understatement for that, what she feels could not be put into words and the same should be the case for Carlo. See, these two had been through a lot, they were like us, college-mates (Tanya and Don were too!) who became lovers. Just like other love stories, they had ups and downs. Perhaps the worst was breaking up twice or thrice? The last break up was a breather for the two of them. While it was Dhory who said quits, Carlo showed his ever-relentless love and finally, they were back to each others' arms.
Now, I bet Carlo is just ecstatic and won't be able to sleep well because of emotions, I wouldn't be surprised if he'd cry a river tomorrow. I love seeing tears and drama during weddings, who would not? It's great to see individuals uniting, committing to each other, promising eternal love and forever-ness if that's even a word.
Image credits: George C. Busico
"In a world full of "no forever", two individuals would prove the world otherwise."
But getting married is not an easy thing, even so not a cheap one to occur, it has its own price tag. It is true that this happens once in a lifetime, maybe some happen more than once but a majority of Filipinos do that only one time and most families, especially in this country, believe that it is worth all the spendings, after all, its a life's milestone.
Cost of Getting Married...
Image credits: George C. Busico
I always hear couples getting into huge debt due to weddings. I read articles of parents who were unable to pay their dues, of married individuals who had to sacrifice a lot just so they can push the marriage, the ceremony and the fun reception afterward. Getting married is definitely wonderful but also costly.
First of all, getting married is not just a contract that one can use so to be legally correct with their romantic experience, it is actually sacred, a covenant filled with a commitment that no matter what, you'll choose to be with him or her for better or for worse. So it is indeed best to be fully committed before saying that "I do's" and tossing that money out for the ceremony.
Here are the things to consider and the estimated cost of getting married:
Wedding Planner or DIY?
Image credits: George C. Busico
Believe it or not, planning a wedding is a daunting task, there are things to consider, lots of people to get in contact with, you'll probably spend numerous weeks or months to get everything done. So it is something to consider, DIY which will save the two of you money or get a wedding planner which will cost some and there's also a risk included in it like getting scammed or anything similar.
Ceremony Venue or Location
Whether you want your wedding in a church or on a beach or garden, there are fees for it. Perhaps you'll be lucky or say blessed if you get free use of the church for the ceremony but certainly not free for a garden or beach resort unless you are the owner.
Wedding Dresses, Makeup, and Hair
Image credits: George C. Busico
Its another consideration to take, should you buy a brand new wedding dress? Maybe rent a whole set? Or reuse your mom's.
Are you going to do your own makeup and hair? Certainly not! The bride wants her hand to be relaxed and beautiful on her day so the looks and style have to be outsourced, this also comes with another set of price, think wise!
Wedding Invitations
It may be a simple paperwork but this doesn't mean it won't cost you. Design, edit, and print cost hundreds of bucks nowadays. But going digital is also a thing nowadays, consider it thoroughly.
Food, Cake, Caterers, Menu and Bar
Image credits: George C. Busico
Do not forget the reception after the ceremony, one thing to really do weigh out is the number of people attending the wedding. There's a very bad Filipino habit of gatecrashing which is very inappropriate but is also very real so be ready with the surprise.
Florists, Entertainment and Staffing
The small details still cost, the DJ who'd be playing songs during the reception, the singers during the ceremony, the bands. Not to also forget the decoration both during and after the ceremony, the flowers.
You'd get someone to also arrange your entourage during the wedding proper. I know this is such a confusion during on set.
Transport
Image credits: George C. Busico
Bridal car, or should you consider going unique and cool by riding a motorcycle on the way to the location? You don't want your bride's hair and makeup messed up before even reaching the altar.
Photo and Video
In this modern social media age, documentation is one of the "needs" of every celebration. Of course, you are getting married in a church or a beautiful garden, it is indeed a waste if no one's going to document that most special day of your lives so better yet, hire the best in town.
The best means also paying off more than Php 20,000 for the entire prenuptial and wedding ceremony package. Possibly, that price is just the minimum, I am not quite sure how much is a grand package cost nowadays.
Video credits: WhatsUp Pinoy via YouTube
Consider A Simple, Solemn Civil Wedding?
I have thought of it again and again, should I go through the hassle just so I can be with the person I love the most? The two to five hours of ceremony and reception, will it matter after that wedding day?
Tying the know comes with a label, a price tag, consider it wisely. Don't let your emotions take over your decision-making while also still respecting that sacred covenant. There are options for the grand expenditures.
Image credits: George C. Busico
Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against grand weddings, I am just saying that if you can afford without breaking a bank, then go for it but if you will dive into a loan just to pursue it, making yourself poor because of this one-day event, think again. What happens after the wedding and the days to come is much more important.
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Thanks for reading!
About the author:
Jean Beltran-Figues is a photography enthusiast.
A traveler who wants to promote her beloved country, the Philippines.
