Let's refresh your memory a bit on the movie: the rugrats and their families fly off to Paris, and the babies of course wreak havoc whilst having fun as well as attempt to stop Chuckie's dad from marrying an evil theme park employee/manager. It's time to be nitpicky for the love of the Internet, so get into the spirit!

 

1. How Did An Impromptu International Plane Flight Operate So Smoothly?

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This was a trip to Paris specifically for Tommy's dad Stu, but due to some miscommunication, he brought all of his friends and family along. They knew they were going on this trip for literally less than 12 hours. Kira (Coco's assistant and Chuckie's *maybe* new mom) called him at 3:00 AM, the flight was at 10:30 AM. If this was all so impromptu, HOW did they all manage to get on the same plane and HOW wasn't the flight already full and HOW were their babies' passport photos processed so fast? The adults' occupations were never really discussed on the show, but I suppose they're all rolling in dough, because they just dropped a fortune on this trip that they didn't all need to be on.

 

 

2. They Couldn't Have Asked Susie's Family To Dog Sit?

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Spike, the Pickles family's pet dog, was also brought along to Paris, while Susie Carmichael and her family were the only ones who stayed home (maybe they realized that packing up everything and traveling out of the country with less than 12 hours notice was ridiculous and impractical). Instead of paying extra to bring the pooch onto the plane, why didn't the Pickles' just use common sense and let them watch their dog? It costs less to write down what time he needs his Frontline Plus treatment than it does to fly him around the world for a trip he doesn't need to be on. I know dogs are "part of the family," but come on now!

 

 

3. Everyone Continues To Ignore That Angelica Is a Menace

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How do they still not realize something in Angelica's brain isn't screwed in tightly? First, let's not forget that the whole reason Coco wants to marry Chuckie's dad is BECAUSE of Angelica's evil little mind. If they get married, there's a chance she could get a pony and a float in the Reptar Parade. Perfect incentive to destroy some lives. Then, Angelica and some Sumo Waiters parodied the song "Bad Girls" by Donna Summer during the gang's night out at a sushi/karaoke restaurant. The lyrics were changed to reflect Angelica bragging about constantly tricking the babies because "they don't know a thing," followed by a sinister laugh from the flaxen-haired demon child...and all the adults just shrugged it off. A three-year-old could possibly ruin a family's future and is laughing maniacally at the thought of picking on other small children, and everyone is still SO in the dark about it. WAKE UP.

 

 

4. No One Noticed Spike Was Running Around Paris?

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No one in the Pickles/Finster/DeVille clan once thought about the fact that the family dog was galavanting around the City of Lights, hooking up with hot French poodles and defacing public property by peeing on the Eiffel Tower? And no authorities tried to let them know? If they pretty much forgot he was there...maybe HE SHOULDN'T HAVE COME AT ALL.

 

 

5. No One Could Tell That Coco Wasn't The Princess Right Away?

 

 

 

When the crew goes to the play that Stu's inventions are a part of, Coco forcibly drags the actress playing the princess off stage during her solo in order to perform in her place to play to Chuckie's emotions. The song the princess is singing is beautiful and her voice sounds angelic. Then, Coco comes in, tries to sing her part and sounds like nails in a blender set to puree. But everyone is completely duped and believes Coco really IS the princess. Her geisha makeup just came off and her voice magically started sounding shrill in two seconds flat? And no one saw a thinly-veiled figure come on stage and pluck this woman away mid- song? I know they have cloudy judgement from time to time but in what universe is that the same woman?

 

6. How Did Those Security Guards Get Hired?

 

When the babies escape Ooey Gooey World to try and find the Princess' castle, Coco's ninja security guards chase them to try and put a stop to it. Plot twist: they're way too stupid to get the job done. They're getting lifted several feet in the air by the park's water fountains while the babies run through them with ease, they're tripping on ooey gooey green shit that Phil and Lil had in their diapers and one of the "ninja's" pants come off. Honestly, if you're going to pose as a ninja, at least have some sort of coordination or at least have a swift mind! If grown ass men can't catch *infants* running throughout a theme park, then who can?

7. Pizza Gets Hard When It's Left Out, NOT Sticky

via tsg-community

Spike (I'm so sorry to keep bringing him up) and his poodle girlfriend share a slice of sticky fly-ridden trash can pizza a la Lady and the Tramp. Their mouths get stuck together, and try as they might to get unstuck, it doesn't work. In reality, if pizza is left out, it gets hard, not sticky. Plus, the pizza wasn't put in the oven or anything, so there's no way the previously- hardened cheese would have gotten hot and sticky enough to have the two dogs stick together. Also, I don't know if it's a good idea to give dogs pizza, especially if it's spoiled or rotten. It had flies swarming around it, that pizza was NOT good for anyone to eat.

8. Did Chaz SERIOUSLY Think That His Marriage To Coco Would Work Out?

via rugrats-wikia

Clearly, Coco wore the pants in this fake relationship, so there's no way she would have moved back to the United States with them and abandon her career had they actually gotten married. They would have had to drop everything, leave their friends and family, pack up and stay in France for a lifetime of misery and deceit. I know Chaz was desperate to be in a relationship, but he fell for this wretch in two days! And Didi said something to him THE DAY of his wedding about how "she thinks they're rushing it." THANKS DEED, you couldn't have said that earlier?! I mean, she thought his name was 'Chad' for Pete's sake! Huge red flag!

9. No Two-Year-Old is Strong Enough To Burst Through A Door

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Chuckie stops his father's wedding by bursting through the doors of the Parisian church and shouting "NO!" to object the marriage. There's no way that sheer adrenaline and disdain for a scheming amusement park owner would help you bust through the heavy door of a church without breaking a sweat at two years of age. At two-years-old, I couldn't even reach the doorknob, let alone burst through a door in a dramatic fashion. "No" is right!

10. Why Was "Who Let The Dogs Out?" Even A Thing?

 

 

This song was the MF jam when I was 7 thanks to this movie, but who, who, who, who, who let this song become as big as it did? What is this song really about? Why did it win a Grammy? More important- why did I own the Baha Men's album and why do I still have it and why do I want to listen to it?