It is a heavy traffic road runs through. For this reason, it is always vigilant when traveling on this road, by just a small oversight, anyone know what will happen. But I do not care about that. Why? Why I'm want to end their lives with a ... dead. And this road will help me do that, quickly, inexpensively time. Whether that will be physically painful, but can not with the "shock" is going through my mind. I would go, when no one needs me anymore!

space-shuttle-se-through

Since each pass through this road, so I know there is a wide range vacant land next to it. I had come from an hour ago, sitting under the trees and take care of your tasks. I opened my backpack, grab the first book last week bought out watching. I recently read a story the other half and because of (the heart thing has made me to death) made ​​me unable to finish reading the book. So, I'd like to read notes, especially when time is running out, and I did not want to abandon. My tears poured out. Just like to see her in it. Next, I took the paper wrote, "the concern sun" on it, because at this time there is no one next to me, assuming there is one way, they did not hear what I say, just people who love me. Closed two-sided paper, I folded and place in a small bag, and sandwiched between books. I continue to get things I love to watch again. This is my favorite bracelet, buy fair when the same crowd you. This is the watch my dad's birthday gift for 17 years. Here, the key chain I picked up, so nice to hold. There are many small things, pretty well. Each associated with a memory, that memory it can never be removed. Tears I left. To all in the same place, I unzipped the backpack and shoulder strap.

I stood up and felt a nostalgic nothing more. And few more minutes, I'll go somewhere else, that probably will not suffer and more peaceful than this place. I'm still crying, but now closed mi back then. I run, run very fast.

Just sit away from the tree. Footsteps heard on the ground to start with. And now, I hear the sound of cars anymore. Very close. Very noisy. I would cross the road without looking, going very fast and gentle stop, right?

I have run all legs, and ears to hear more wind noise. I do not know that there is no more wind. Because it sounded like someone running footsteps behind me. Not sure, but I can assure no one can get me anywhere, so I've decided. But within five seconds, like an electric shock have sucked me in, making me jump shooting. I opened my eyes about, think "I was dead, quickly so? Death truth already?" But not so, because there is a car braking in front of me. And I startled him, because there is another hand holding tight and pulled back.

- He is crazy? - Voice of fatigue - How you're dead!

- Despite my determination. - I turn round and shout in his face - I am wanting to die, to die here!

- How old are you? - He veered into another problem, I think.

- What's involved in here? - I asked, but he replied - Eighteen-year-old.

- New eighteen all? - He was surprised - I'm not dead duoc.Theo.

Said he had just pulled me in, despite I agree or not. Obviously, I do not even know him, why would he meddle in mine, do not let me die. But the more confusing this time I was willing to go after him? To his fist? Or just then, because I was the driver that he yelled to pull over cars, so I wanted to return the favor.

I do not know. But I'm clear, I'm not dead.

***

Drag me into the tree just now, did he let go of my hand, told me to sit down there. I nodded, and the two of us sitting together. I was silent, still angry inside because he had accused me. And he, like just now, told me in a voice still slightly warm bass crossbow.

- Why do you want to die?

- I told you, even my body. It's not your job! - I bitter cold.

- Yes, it's not my job. But you know, there are many people who do not really need him?

- No one needs me anymore! - I speak more softly just now - it's true!

- Why does anyone need to configure any more? - He turned to look I suggest - he told me okay?

He finished speaking, I looked hesitantly. Why do I have to tell my story to hear him anyway? Who is he, I did not even know. However, when looking at his eyes, I knew he was waiting and really want to hear my story. As for me, wondering where to start counting so. By thought, the sad story but to keep inside will not help.

***

More than two weeks ago, between me and you you chicken Quy- cotton had happened a few discord. Ideas such as how many times, after a couple of days where we were at it. But this time was different, everything seems to have gone beyond its limits. I waited silently as something from you. But my response, he is silent. Even more intense was silent.

The first is that we are no longer there nua.Sau carpooling, to the class, we did not say anything to each other. Then he avoided me. Evade my gaze. I wonder, and do not understand why things change so quickly. I myself do not know, in other frictions who is right, who is wrong. Just said more than once, I've wanted to be the proactive initiative apologize in advance

It was an afternoon after school and I lingered in the hallway waiting Quarter classes. Obviously you know I wait for him, but the zippy mentioned as I do not call you back. So that when you stand back, you're just saying the words whole my heart sank. I know you people are not petty, but his heart was not tolerant enough to ignore things that it should not happen like that. We broke up. The pain and despair. Because he is loving me? So I do not think that the two of us used to be best friends.

- He deserves to have you do this? - He sat next to suddenly asked. - I really did not understand what he was thinking too!

- How can you understand? - I sighed - And many more things happened.

- I still listen to him-he said you - If you want to talk to.

Two days after the break up, I knew Quarter has a new girlfriend. I realized he did not have to break up because of friction there, but because he does not love me anymore. I feel pain and naive. Why do I love him with all your heart? Why do you treat me like that. Then I feel like I have to find another person to replace him. But I did not do it. Because I always think about him, and wept over him! I also understand that, no one can replace him in me. Everything related to him was so profound, she accidentally left a void that nothing is plugged.

- It turned out later that, should he find it? - He recalled sitting next to you, then smirked - You think you will have a beautiful death for love? It's blind!

- You can not hurry like it? - I frowned.

- Do you do I think like that?

- I think he was holding back before the automobile came running right over!

Do not say anything you silent anymore. I continued my story.

Between me and you do not have anything, even friendship nor ever cultivated. New think so, I shed tears. And do not know how to get out of her sadness. It's too hard. Back even harder, if no one helps me.

Then I remembered my family. Where I have loved ones inside. Not to mention, my parents are also very psychological, and probably they will help me overcome this sadness unsteady. Just thought that was it, I wanted to run down to the parents, crying like a child, after all what I was going through.

But I could not talk to my parents, I have also witnessed more of the conversation between father and mother. It is not difficult to recognize the distance between them at the time. Dad tried to come home late. Some days, he stepped to the door, I smelled alcohol concentration anonymously. My mother did not say anything, just walked away sighing. He entered the room, my mother is not in the right, but later I saw two people loudly.

Then have breakfast, although deliberately late, but my dad still run into meals. Having to sit on, but he did not seem comfortable. Both meals immersed in silence. For me, though his storytelling want out, they did not know what to tell as yet, in such a situation. I locked myself in a room, do his pain with tears and thoughts of you.

However, I am still waiting, some time to tell my parents listening. There, it does not happen again. After the Cold War days, my parents began arguing loudly, even when I know at home. Design thinking, I do not think that these interventions because of the stuffy parents should be freed. But it seems, the game was never quarreled signs of hypothermia, or end. I am in pain, seeing my family have cracks.

One day, my mother and father were both early. Because the dining room and living room are not very far apart, so I found out what was going on between father and mother. I'm so happy because my parents have to be able to sit calmly talk to each other. So, I believe my family going back to the peaceful days. But things are beyond my thoughts. I'm shocked, because I knew my parents would divorce.

And when dad brought divorce papers to his mother, I could not help but run into and took it. I shed tears. Parents look, but no one said anything.

- Why is this? Why do it? - I hiccups - parents can tell me what has happened is not it?

- I'm sorry - he said, then turned away avoiding my gaze.

- I'm sorry baby! - My mother spoke.

My tears still fall unconscious. I put my hand down, in the hope they will help me change what is happening. Like hope, my parents know how much pain I will if the two divorce. But still no one said anything. Divorce papers on the table with a pen. Indeed, I have wanted to work in, grabbed it and spun into hundreds of pieces. But spiders, I can not do that. Because I want it to be resolved by the passion of a ... child.

A hand grabbed my father, a mother grabbed my hand. I said.

- Parents can because you are not?

My parents are silent. But through their eyes, I know the answer, and know I can not change the decision of the parents. Sharp pain in my make up, but nothing can describe it. I thought, why the people I love, no one wants to stay next to me?

- That's all the reason? - Do you sit next to ask again, then added - With hope, when he dies, he will realize you chicken Cotton asked him how much he? And his parents will return with another surface?

- I think? - I asked - Rather like what they have is not good. At least, my death is also helpful.

- You're an idiot, if not that, they can tie together many brilliant things, but love is not? - He shrugged and said you - And if he dies, then the distance between his mother and father can be pushed out beyond that! Since then, nothing binding them anymore!

- But I have a pain, you know? - I am facing upwards, compressing the tears do not fall off.

- What do you have to ask yourself, the pain that will help you become more mature?

- At the time, I do not think so much!

- I know. Fortunately I was able to stop him again.

I'm now much calmer. Nonetheless, I still want to die. However, I can not do it now, because I know you're there you'll prevented me. And I will definitely wait until you're about.

Our silence. I do not know what he's thinking. But I thought Star escape "wanted to die". I want to catch him on the other you as soon as possible. I do not want to prolong things.

So I will probably abandon his intention, and life miserable. While the spirit of people think, when suddenly he spoke. As can guess my thought so.

- Do you still intend to die stars?

- Of course! - I honestly - I have never abandoned the idea of ​​it all!

- You're hopeless! but I have to tell you one guy one more thing.

- What is it? You said it! - I urge, and did not understand why I would want to hear him say that.

- In life, there are many reasons for this, and other reasons hophair struggle to live. and always yearning to live. So why, because things he can pass, can you give it up so easily? Especially when he was young.

I was startled and turned to look at him. Suddenly, I shed tears, not because the story has gone through, but because I was going to do stupid things. Fortunately, he pulled my hand back. If not this time, I was in a different world, and sit remorse.

I awoke after his last sentence you. I want to run right home, faced with what is happening. And I also do not want to give up this life anymore. by I realized, when I die, I can release from jute pain, but many others will be painful for me. Such cruel.

- Thank you! - I turned to smile at the boy sitting next to.

- I'm happy, because he was able to understand what I'm saying! - Boy glance - Now get up out of it!

- How about you?

- I'll stay here, continue to help people who intend to death like you!

He finished speaking and then you laugh. I thought you were joking, so run forward waving. Until much later, I knew what he said was that.Cau was here, to help those who want to die like me. Because he does not want more people gionh her​​, because the story would have overcome that plunged into cars perished. I also ask people around here, they say, the year he died, his last seventeen years old, and that year was also the year that his parents divorced.

I will not forget you, forget the fist tightly, but also lightweight aerial has pulled me back.

I also will not forget what he told me: Do not give up life easily. Thus, I will learn to accept things and always think that time will pass, take time to wipe away the sorrow of my ...